Out with the sick...

We have a few friends coming over tonight, nothing big as I am still not feeling 100%. 2014 started off rough and is ending rough, and I am hoping this new year is different!!

January started off good, my best friend was expecting her first child and February 7th Caroline Rose was born. Also in Feb my friends Scott and Mary announced that they were having a baby and my daughter was accepted into the Art Institute of Pittsburgh! The cold brought a rough time with pain, but I got through it. April 14th I turned 37 years old, and in May my daughter attended her Senior prom. I got to spend Mothers Day with my daughter and my best friend and her daughter, we went to the Mothers day service at church. That afternoon my husband and daughter took me to the zoo! Also in June my daughter and her best friend graduated from High School and I got to spend most mornings on my porch watching the birds. My daughter turned 18 and my husband and I celebrated being married for 16 years! We got to spend another vacation in Duck, NC; we ended up going with some good friends and having a wonderful time. Mary and Scott had the baby, Seth Gary, and then in October my baby moved away. In November we lost our dog Snoop, she was a great dog and I greatly missed. Also in November I got sick and was sick through Thanksgiving. I started to get well, only to get sick with in a few days.

2015 is another year to make some GREAT memories. I hope to spend more time with my family and friends.


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Ready or not its Christmas time!

Ever since my Grandmother died I have had a difficult time getting into the Christmas spirit. I really try but it is always hard. I’m not sure if it is because she is not here or if it is because when she was gone my whole world changed, my focus shifted. I wanted to be like her, to be the one who helped everyone who needed it. Because I’m disabled – I live on a budget, I don’t have the strength or energy to see my family and friends as often, and I have learned the hard way that I cannot help everyone.

This year Christmas seems to be approaching so quickly that I don’t feel I’m ready! Not to mention my budget sure isn’t ready either. I’m Catholic, so Christmas has a deep meaning for me and my family that goes beyond presents. It is difficult though when you really want to give to others. Luckily my daughter will be home for a while so my husband and I have a month. Haha

I have been sick; I’m still working on getting better. My voice comes back, but not for long. I finally have energy to get Christmas cards out. Maybe.

Over the weekend, the cemetery had a candle vigil for the holidays and my husband and I went. It was beautiful and we loved it. I took a lighter and relit a few candles that had blown out, we were both cold but it was totally worth it!

Time

I have been sick now for 22 days. Curious about what took me down? Not the flu, but a cold. The flu would have been disastrous. This was still rough, it still is. My husband was afraid to leave me to go to work, and when he did go he made sure someone was taking care of me. I spent a few days in the hospital, but left because they were doing nothing. They didn’t change any of my meds, they didn’t start any new meds, I had to ASK for CPT (!!!), the doctor didn’t even introduce himself, and they didn’t even figure out what is wrong!

Well, to be fair they gave me IV fluids and oxygen.

I saw my primary; she said it was probably a little cold that my body just couldn’t fight off. A little cold, she said! Something that took others 2 or 3 days to get over has been the bane of my existence for the last 22 days. Sometimes I forget I’m sick, forget that my life is not what it was. I am not feeling sorry for myself or looking for pity, I love my life. I love where I am and who I am surrounded by; my health is just a small facet of my life. So when I complain about it, it isn’t because I’m miserable but rather because some days it pulls my focus. I can’t think of anything else. I worry about things that I’m sure a lot of people my age don’t think about.

Because I consider life and death on almost a daily basis, I realize how much I love the people in my life. The ones who take care of me, the ones who offer to help, even those who put their heads in the sand. My life is not for the faint at heart, it’s not for the weak, and the people who have stuck around have shown me strength and love.
I appreciate them, I appreciate every second I have with them.

Time is precious.

Our time is finite.

Make your time matter.

Even if it is just helping your neighbor, or being a role model for the kid next door.

Do something guys.

Don’t wait. Do it now.